Transitions by William Bridges (Book Review)

Must-read for those going through a personal transformation, voluntary or not

Quick take: Bridges model of transitions as a three-stage process — ending, neutral zone, beginning — is deceptively simple yet powerful. Drawing from literature, mythology, and tribal passage rituals, he presents reinventions as natural unfolding processes. With empathy and insight, Bridges’ book provides guidance and wisdom for anyone looking to transform their life.

full review

First published in 1980 and reissued recently as a 40th anniversary edition, Transitions: Making Sense of Life’s Changes was written by William Bridges with his wife Susan Bridges. Bridges (1933 — 2013) worked as a professor of American Literature at Mills College until 1974, when he underwent his own career reinvention and became a consultant.

His book presents snippets of his own story as well as that of people he counseled as they went through transitions ranging from divorce to retirement to career change. He draws from mythology, literature, and tribal coming-of-age rituals in his engaging and insightful writing.

Like many people who write about reinvention, he organizes the process by means of stages. He proposes that transitions consist of three phases: experienceing an ending, living through the neutral zone, and making a new beginning. Of these three stages, I found his treatment of the neutral zone most nuanced and helpful.

the ending

Bridges observes that we are, in general, poor at handling endings. Endings are messy. Sometimes they happen when we decide (we leave a job or a relationship) but often they happen without our consent or decision (we lose a job, our partner leaves us).

Endings can make you feel disengaged, disenchanted, and disidentified; no longer the person you once were, but also not the person you are going to become. Bridges says, “the old identity stands in the way of transition—and of transformation and self-renewal.”

To Bridges, disenchantment in particular is a signal that you are moving into a transition: “The disenchantment experience is the signal that the time has come to look below the surface of what has been thought to be so. It is the sign that you are ready to see and understand more now.”

the neutral zone

In Bridges’ formulation, the neutral zone is a time between an ending and a beginning, when you are not what you once were, but you have also not become a new version of yourself. It is a time of “fertile emptiness.”

Bridges cautions transitioners against trying to move through this phase too quickly:

As does any unfolding natural process, the neutral zone takes its own sweet time. “Speeding things up,” hitting the fast forward button, is a tempting idea, but that only stirs things up in ways that disrupt the natural formative processes that are going on. Far from bringing you out of the neutral zone sooner, such tactics usually set you back and force you to start over again. Frustrating though it is, the best advice is to opt for the turtle and forget the hare.

Bridges provides suggested neutral zone tactics, beyond cultivating patience. He suggests you carve out alone time, keep a journal of neutral zone experiences, write an autobiography, explore what you really want, and perhaps even go on a passage journey.

What he doesn’t tell you is how the heck to move to the next stage: making a beginning.

making a beginning

Bridges says, “when we are ready to make a new beginning, we will shortly find an opportunity.” In this, he acknowledges the reality of personal transformation that it is an organic, unfolding process not a mechanistic one that can be planned and executed step by step.

In Chapter 7 “You Finish with a New Beginning,”, he analogizes this to childbirth:

Although evidence shows that attitudes are changing, birth has usually been regarded in this country as a surgical procedure, and pregnancy as a form of disability. The baby was taken and the mother put to sleep while the technicians did their work. The implications of these attitudes are far reaching, for as a society views birth, so it will view rebirth. Just as our primal beginning is mechanized, so are all subsequent beginnings; they are viewed as occasions for getting things started again after they have stopped….

Even as you start reading this chapter about the new beginning, you may well be waiting for the procedure that must surely be here somewhere—the checklist that you’re supposed to run through when life has stalled and refuses to start up again properly.

I find this in some ways the weakest part of the book, although it aligns well with his overarching theory of transition. He suggests you watch for signals of your new beginning. These, he say, may arrive in the form of an idea, an impression, or an image. Sometimes, someone close to you may make a comment that turns your thinking in a new direction. And sometimes you will get the hint of your beginning in dreams.

In this chapter, Bridges alerts the reader to the possibility of resistance. As you determine where your new beginning lies, part of you may rebel. As you change, the resister inside you may try to prevent you from moving forward and becoming more autonomous. As well, people close to you may resist the changes you are making, especially if they affect them in some important way.

Perhaps paradoxically, because in the section on neutral zones he encourages you to take your time and go inside yourself rather than hurrying to a new beginning, Bridges says to make a new beginning you should stop getting ready and act. Getting ready is a task that may never end. He says, “one of the forms that inner resistance can often take is the attempt to make just a few more (and then more, and again more) preparations.”

He also suggests that you start identifying yourself with the person you will become as a result of the new beginning.

He further suggests that you should take your projeccts step by step and “resist the siren song that sings about some other route where everythint goes smoothly and events are always exciting and meaningful.” Don’t get preoccupied with results; instead take the turtle steps you need to as you make your new beginning.

conclusion

Transitions is a must-read for people contemplating any kind of reinvention: career, relationship, health, and so forth. If you’re struggling with a transition this book will certainly provide not just comfort but also practical ideas for managing your transformation.